


Your Laws Do Not Apply To Me

by Magnetism_bind



Category: Black Sails
Genre: Alternate Universe - Modern Setting, Bisexuality, Domestic, Everyone is Bisexual, F/M, Frustration, Happy Ending, M/M, Modern Era, Multi, Polyamory, Tumblr Prompt, conversations about bisexuality, winter feelings
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-11-19
Updated: 2017-11-19
Packaged: 2019-02-04 05:51:12
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,939
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/12764496
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Magnetism_bind/pseuds/Magnetism_bind
Summary: In spite of being generally content with his relationship with Thomas & Miranda, James is still often frustrated by how he's perceived when he's with either or both partners.Sexuality, strong and warm and wild and freeSexuality, your laws do not apply to meSexuality, don't threaten me with miserySexuality, I demand equality- Billy Bragg





	Your Laws Do Not Apply To Me

 

 Saturday, late November, the dark already closing in even though it’s only a little after six.

The shops are busy and James is more than ready to be done and just be home already. He grabs a carton of milk and adds it to the cart. Cereal, bread, cream, eggs, orange juice, bacon. _More butter_ , he thinks and continues strolling down the aisle. At last he finds Thomas in the biscuit aisle, studying a packet of Ginger Cremes with a studious expression.

“Ginger or chocolate?” Thomas inquires.

“Both.” James says.

“Mm, good answer.” Thomas drops a package of each into the cart and they start walking down the aisle together. “Did you get the cream?”

“Yes.”

“Is that all?” Thomas runs his eyes over the rest of the contents of the cart.

James procures the list which he wrote on his phone earlier because he knew it would it be like this if he didn’t. “Wine.” He remembers.

“Why don’t you go get in line and I’ll grab some?” Thomas suggests.

“Would you?” James asks gratefully. The sooner they’re in line, the sooner they can go home.

“Of course.” Thomas squeezes his hip lightly and goes off towards the wine aisle.

James makes his way to the front of the store, already feeling better. It’s not that he dislikes winter, but he’s ready for spring already. He wants it to still be light out when he’s done with work for the day. He wants to have time left in the day, damn it.

He has most of the groceries unloaded by the time Thomas returns with three bottles of wine.

“Here you go, my love.” Thomas says cheerfully. He sets them on the counter.

The cashier smiles at him. “You and your partner are very attractive together.”

James forces a smile while Thomas simply beams at her. “Thank you.”

 *  *  *

“That still bothers you.” Thomas observes as they walk out with their bags.

“What?”

“When people simply assume you’re gay?” Thomas unlocks the car and they start setting the bags in the back.

Something flickers in James’s eyes. “No…” He doesn’t want to get into this again; there’s no solving it.

“Or straight.” Thomas amends because he knows it’s not that simple. “Admit it.”

James sighs. “It’s just…you know.” He never means to make Thomas uncomfortable but it’s true.

Thomas sighs as well. “I know.”

And he _does_ , because while Thomas is also bi (and Miranda as well, for that matter) he does understand that out of the three of them, it frustrates James the most, all the assumptions people make when it’s just the two of them, or when it’s James and Miranda together, or the inevitable confusion and generalizations when it’s the three of them. There is always an assumption and either one has to go along with it, or one has to correct someone and it’s exhausting.

He’s lucky and James knows it. It’s rare to meet one person you fit with in this mess of a world. Two is extravagance, pushing the limits of what the universe will give him. Maybe he shouldn’t ask for more, but he still wants more, damn it.

He wants people to know that he’s _with_ the Hamiltons. That _they_ are his. They’re the married ones, yes, but that’s a simple legality. He’s Miranda’s and Miranda is his and he’s Thomas’s and Thomas is Miranda’s and his and she is Thomas’s and and they all fit.

It’s rare and he’s lucky and James knows he needs to accept this but it doesn’t mean he doesn’t still want more.

 *  *  *

“Do you miss having a girlfriend?” Thomas asks one morning while they’re lingering in bed. James has already left for work, getting dressed in a rush for an early meeting before his first class starts. Thomas can still taste the toothpaste on his lips from the quick kiss James had given him.

“What brought this on?” Miranda murmurs sleepily, her eyes not even open yet.

“Nothing in particular.” Thomas’s fingers stroke her shoulder absently. “I just think at times, it stillwears on James…the assumptions.”

“That’s not your fault.” Miranda says consolingly. “We’re both just more used to the way the world perceives us.”

“I know.” Thomas sighs. “I just wish it were easier, you know.”

“I know.” She slips an arm around him, embracing him. “And to answer your question, yes sometimes I miss having a girlfriend, but I don’t assume I will never have another one, you know.”

“Of course, I never meant,” Thomas starts.

Miranda leans up and presses a soft kiss to his mouth. “I know, darling, I know.” She leans back against the pillow, smiling at him. "It’s just a matter of meeting the right woman.”

“Don’t I know it.” Thomas murmurs, leaning down to kiss her again.

 *  *  *

Miranda had known she was bisexual since she was ten and a girl with glasses and short black hair in her class had asked to borrow a pencil. She smiled at Miranda, and Miranda had thought she had never seen such pretty lips before. She had always liked both girls and boys and it had been a source of consternation and constant problems with her parents so eventually she had stopped bringing people home to meet them. They weren’t appreciated, and they deserved to be appreciated.

She brought Thomas home because it didn’t matter that her parents assumed she was “choosing.” It didn't matter what they thought at that point. She had never thought she would marry a man, but Thomas was different and better and she fell in love.

And then one day she had met an auburn-haired man in the coffeehouse near the university where she taught music classes and her heart stopped again.

Sometimes the universe simply brings people to you and says, _‘here you are, you should be together, but you have to make the effort to keep them, show them they're wanted.'_

Miranda likes listening to the universe. 

 *  *  *

It’s mid-afternoon, the gray twilight slanting across the windows of James's office. There’s been silence in the room for five minutes now while he waits for the student sitting across his desk from him to speak.

“Eleanor.” James prods. “If you don’t actually talk during your visit to my office, then I need to make my office hours available for other students.” Usually Eleanor has plenty to say during their meetings. She’s one of his best students (His favorite student, if he’s honest.) But something has been going on lately and he’s let it go on long enough.

At last Eleanor sighs. “I don’t know what to do.”

“That’s evident.” James says. “Judging from your work you’ve turned in the last few weeks. Now what’s wrong?”

She sighs again, fingers picking at the corner of her notebook sitting on her lap. “So there’s this girl.”

“Ah.” James says, and waits.

“I really like her.” Eleanor says, glancing up and off to the side, nowhere near meeting his eye.

“All right.” James says and waits.

Eleanor draws a long breath and then finally looks up at him. “So if I tell everyone and by everyone I mean my dad, you know, but yeah, everyone, they’ll be like 'so you’re a lesbian now then?'”

“And?” James asks when again the silence grows and grows.

“And I’m not…comfortable with that label.” Eleanor says finally, chewing on her thumbnail.

“Because…” James prompts when she’s been silent again for a while. He resists looking at the clock. Eleanor deserves all his time and attention and Thomas and Miranda will understand.

“Because I still like dick, okay?” Eleanor shoots back and then blushes furiously.

James snorts. “I see. So what’s the problem then?”

“They always want you to choose?” There’s a note of desperation in Eleanor’s voice and James finds himself flinching in sympathy. “They make you choose and I don’t _want_ to, even though I really really like this girl, Professor, and if I thought for a second it was just girls forever, I’d say it in a heartbeat, but I can’t, cause it’d be a lie, you know?”

“I do.” James says, and whatever tone he has now makes Eleanor look at him a little sideways.

“You don’t have to choose.” James tells her, softening his voice just a little. “Society does tend to be unnecessarily confused by bisexuality, but no one can make you choose, Eleanor.”

“And you know this from personal experience, do you?” Eleanor crosses her arms over her chest and sinks lower in her chair.

“As a matter of fact, yes.” James says.

Eleanor sits up straight in her at that. “But your boyfriend!”

“What about him?”

“I mean, you are with Mr. Hamilton, right? You’ll break all the girls hearts if you say you’re not.”

“Rest assured, Mr. Hamilton and I are still very much together.”

“Oh thank christ.” Eleanor says. “But, what do you mean then?”

“For starters, like you pointed out, even if you’re with one partner, it doesn’t mean you’ve stopped being bisexual. It just means that’s the partner you’re currently with.” He hesitates. It’s always dicey saying things to students. It’s a fine line, being honest with someone who needs personal reassurance and another saying things of a personal nature to a student that could so easily be misconstrued as inappropriate if they were reported. If it was any other student, he might have hesitated further, but Eleanor would never...and sometimes it's worth taking a risk, to encourage a student.

“Are you saying you’re…” Eleanor pauses, and then almost defiantly, “bisexual too?”

“Yes.” James says after a moment. “I am.”

“So…”

“So I am very happily not choosing.” James says and then, what the hell. “Because not only am I that, but I am also polyamorous.” He wonders if there will ever come a time when he could ever just say that without second-guessing everything. _Time would tell,_ he supposes.

“Do you have pictures of your partners?” Eleanor demands next.

James wavers. And then, what the hell, he’s already in this deep. He takes out his phone and tapes it. He holds it out for her inspection.

Eleanor stares at his background with surprise and delight. “So….”

“That’s Thomas and Miranda and me.” James hears the blatant affection in his voice. No wonder no one is surprised by his relationship. It’s openly nauseating, the sort of thing he would loathe in someone else. “We’re all together.”

Eleanor just gazes at the picture and then she hands the phone back. “Thank you.” She says quietly. “For sharing this with me.”

“You’re welcome.” James puts his phone back in his pocket. “I just wanted you to know, Eleanor….you get to decide what happens in your life. It doesn’t mean it will be easy, in any regard. And other people won’t always like it, but that doesn’t necessarily matter. What matters is you are doing the right things for you, making your own choices.”

“Are you happy?” Eleanor asks abruptly.

James pauses again, honestly considering the question. What would be encouraging, but truthful? What could he say?

He worries about the effects of the world, how the future is going to turn out. So much is discouraging from day to day interactions to politicians being less and less truthful every day…the state of the country, the state of the fucking planet for that matter. But at the heart of it all, he has two people he loves very dearly to come home to and they make the hardships of the world a little easier to bear, and more worthwhile to endure and his sheer existence is more real and more joyous and more wonderful because of them.

“Yes.” He says. “I am.”

“Good.” Eleanor says, finally sitting up. “You should be,” She heads for the door. “Thanks.”

“You’re welcome.” James tells her, a little bemused. “Any time.”

 *  *  *

On the way home he stops and buys a bottle of wine. 

Miranda is ensconced in the studio when he gets home. He can hear the sound of her piano, the delicate dance of her fingers upon the keys making him smile. The first time he had ever spent the night here Miranda had played while James had stood behind her and kissed her throat until she turned around and kissed him back.

 _The piano bench was wonderfully sturdy_ , James recalls with a faint smile.

He goes to the studio and pauses in the doorway. Miranda is lovely as always, completely lost in her music, concentration carrying her far away, her hair pulled back with little tendrils escaping to drift past her cheeks. She’s wearing one of his thick sweaters over her pajama bottoms and fuzzy socks and James knows exactly how soft it is against her skin.

“I love you to the ends of the world and back.” James murmurs.

“Then where’s my kiss?” Miranda says without looking up.

James laughs. “Here.” he moves to stand beside her and leans down to kiss her. Her skin smells like violets and he breathes in deep, suddenly overwhelming happy.

“Thomas is running a little late.” Miranda informs him, her fingers still moving gracefully over the keys. “It’s all right as that gave me time to finish up with one of my pupils who needed a little extra time this afternoon.”

“Which?” James’s fingers trails down her hair softly.

“Abigail. She’s really coming along. She plays beautifully, and she has such natural talent, of course, but her relationship with her father causes her such stressful periods it’s appalling.” She sighed. “I wish I could just explain to the damn man that harassing her and causing her stress about her talent doesn’t help.”

“I know the feeling.” James kisses the back of her neck, brushing his fingertips down to the collar of the sweater.

Miranda makes a wry face. “We all know that feeling.” She says quietly. “It’s a hard thing to escape.”

Miranda rarely talked about her own family. James knows that she had been glad to get away from them. His hand closes over hers as it pauses on the piano keys in silence.

“Anyway.” Miranda turns to smile at him. “You seem rather contented tonight.”

“I am.” James tells her. “I had a conversation with one of my students today and it just reminded me of a few things.”

“Such as?” Miranda inquires, loving the way the studio light catches the distinctive lines of his face. She loves those lines so dearly, how often she had kissed each and every one.

“That in the end it doesn’t matter what other people think. Oh, it would be nice if they didn’t assume things.” His fingers played over hers gently. “It would be nice if it didn’t bother me on some level, but I have you and Thomas and that’s what’s truly important in the end.”

“It’s not wrong to want to be visible, James.” Miranda tells him softly. “To be seen for who you truly are.” She cups his face in her hands. “I see you.” She says and kisses him.

“I see you too.” James breathes, kissing her back, his arms going around her. In the end, that was enough. To be recognized by the people you love.

 *  *  *

Outside in the drive, Thomas puts the car in park and sits there for a moment, watching the people he loves embrace there through the studio window.

He smiles at the sight of them. It’s been a long day, but it had ended on a curiously optimistic note. His assistant had been late to her shift and then spent the entirety of it, mooning over her phone instead of helping Thomas with his research as she usually did.

“Max. Max. _MAX_.”

“Hmmm?”

“What on earth is going on with you?”

Max looks up from the page she had been doodling over, instead of checking for errors. “Oh. It’s a girl.”

“Ah.” Thomas says knowingly. “Say no more.”

Max eyes him. “You know how girls make you feel?”

“Yes.” Thomas says in mock indignation. “I know how girls make you feel.” He starts to open his mouth to explain and Max just nods.

“That’s nice.”

“…What’s nice?” Thomas says completely blindsided.

“That you’re bi, right?” Max blinks up at him with quizzical eyes. “So many people are really hung up on that you know, not knowing how to identify, afraid to figure it all out. It can be difficult sometimes.”

“Yes, I know.” Thomas says slowly. He waits a moment. “So this girl, does she return your affections?”

“She does.” Max says with a broad grin. “I think it’s gonna take a little while for things to get sorted..but I think it will be okay.” Her face holds a quiet glow and Thomas can’t find it in him to remind her again that she’s supposed to be checking the papers rather than drawing hearts on them.

“That’s very nice to hear.” Thomas tells her. “I’m glad.”

*  *  *

Sitting there now in the car, thinking about what Max had said. _‘It can be difficult’_  is an understatement. There are so many confusing things to figure out all on your own, and when you add in other people’s ideas of how you’re supposed to be, what you’re supposed to be, it often simply adds to the confusion. Exploring the possibilities just made the world that much more interesting in Thomas’s opinion. The world is so much bigger and more wonderful than people want to believe and he’s happy to share it with his partners. He opens his car door and gets out, whistling slightly as he walks up the pavement towards their home, to the people he loves.


End file.
